Emotional Leverage

Okay, so I’ve talked about small-stepping your way into new habits, I’ve talked about how you have to take the right action amidst the chaos of life, mentioning also that we already know what to do – it’s just doing it that matters. So today I’m going to talk about the final piece of the puzzle, emotional leverage.

You need to actually get an emotional leverage on yourself to actually chance, to actually grow and to actually make yourself a success. For I can talk about challenges and small-stepping my way into good habits all I want, but if I don’t have the emotional leverage I just am not going to stick to it. Emotional leverage often times is anchored in pain – you just feel so bad that you are prepared to go through some other kind of discomfort just to change it. But it might be just being drawn to something so much that you just do anything to get it.

But the absolutely worst place to be is in a good situation. That’s where I am now. I am feeling alright. I’m not having very powerful urge to change even though I know I need to take action still in many parts of my life. Especially on the becoming social part. I mean sure, everything is alright and I can be happy as things stand, but I am not where I ultimately want to be – I’m sure many can relate with the feeling. There’s nothing bad in where you are, and the rewards of putting in the work on your endeavors don’t seem that tempting, so you just don’t take any action.

Just having a blogpost for goals of that year isn’t enough in itself to drive you on. There needs to be drive, the burning desire to make something happen.

That’s the final frontier. Mastering your mind to the extent that you can manufacture that desire for any goal you might have.

I can’t say I can do it. This blog is littered with failed challenges, that often times fail because I didn’t manage to get an emotional leverage on myself. There’s other reasons to it, of course, but that’s one primary one. The times I have managed to get that emotional leverage on myself don’t often even make sense to me.

As said, the emotional leverage always comes from reward or punishment. That’s why if your life is shit, that can trigger you to take heavy action, as the pain of the present continuing is a bad enough prospect to get you moving. But nowadays, for most people, life is just comfortable. It’s not bad and even if your dreams are day by day slowly dying, there’s hardly any pain, just the feeling of mediocrity.

Your survival instincts won’t care if you succeed, they won’t care if you reach your dreams. They won’t care about anything but minimizing the output and maximizing the input. That’s why getting that leverage on yourself when everything is comfortable is so hard.

I know I’m rambling. Really I don’t have any easy answer to how to achieve the emotional leverage when life is just comfortable and your primal mind doesn’t want anything to change. That’s the way for the status quo to remain. My mind right now is in a weird haze that’s resulted from combination of lack of sleep, lack of good food (I have really hard time eating healthy while traveling) and some other debauchery that is something I’m not going to get very detailed about.

If I have to conclude this post somehow I’m going to say this: All of my latest topics work in conjunction. Yet, there has to be emotional leverage, and the more you have it the more you can change at once, but in the end the change is going to be gradual, in other words you will have to small-step your way into it and keep on the process continuously when life throws shit in your face. For small changes you won’t need that much emotional leverage. For instance, how much effort it really takes to start drinking more water? Not really much at all. But starting to talk to strangers on the street when all your life you’ve been anti-social? That’s gonna take a bit more of that leverage.

Some people are blessed in not needing to make big changes in life to become a success. I’m not one of them. I’d be inclined to think anyone reading this blog regularly isn’t that kind of person either. We usually have big enough flaws that take major action and big changes to turn around.

The key thing is that every moment you are either growing tiny bit, or dying tiny bit. The expression of this inner change to your life might be very abrupt, but the inner change itself happens very slowly, by taking the right actions over a long period of time. An example of this is my own income – it jumped up quite quickly, but the process that led to this jump took me couple of years of hard slow work. If I don’t keep up the same work, the same inner traits that enabled the higher income for me will dwindle down and then I might lose it in as abrupt moment – that’s just how it works.

Maybe in the end it is about finding that small emotional leverage in you from moment to moment to do the slightly uncomfortable thing all the time, to move against that flinch, instead of having such pain or deep burning passion for something that makes you completely rehaul your life.

Both things obviously can and will happen, but it is the small actions that are more sustainable.

It’s a battle within yourself – it’s the old adage of you being your own worst enemy, and no one else.

Now, I’m gonna leave you with homework to check this classic post of Julien Smith. I’m going to reread it like fifth time myself.

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