Alright, enough with the esoteric posts about non-resistance and life philosophy. It’s time to get down and dirty – last rush to raise some funds for my Japan trip.
I relaunched the campaign to set the final date later, and lowered my goal for the campaign. The page is still in the behind the same URL. I also edited the perks a bit. Finally I’m going to get more engaged and really put in more effort this time. Going to start daily videos again to get into the groove of shooting and editing videos – if I can’t do it back home with consistent basis, I’m not going to be able in Japan, in foreign environment, especially given I won’t a have a moment’s peace there like I have here.
I’m refusing to give up on this – persistent little fucker, aren’t I? Then again I don’t really have much of a choice but to be persistent if I’m 1700 € short on my budget with no certainties of getting more money in time.
I have unpaid wages yet to receive that would ease me past the worst panic and stress, but there’s absolutely no certainty to receive them in time. Funnily enough I’m yet to even tell my parents (they definitely aren’t following this blog and they wouldn’t even understand it to begin with) – so I’m gonna have to endure a freakout on that matter as well – remember, I might have done the Malaysia trip last year, but I didn’t change my day-to-day life too much… So they are definitely not expecting me to go to Japan – especially in such delicate financial situation. To them I’m still the timid introverted kid I’ve always been. In a sense they are right as well, cause I am timid, introverted and shy… but they can’t see the inner transformation I’m going through.
Why Is This Japan Trip So Important to You?
Put me from two years ago into my shoes right now. This extremely dysfunctional kid would be very stressed for a while, then he would pull back from the whole thing. I’m not going to pull back. I’m going to follow-through. I committed five months ago to making this trip happen. I failed repeatedly in my attempts to earn money. I earned some, but not the goal I set to myself. But I was still committed. I might be lacking money, but in the end if I can afford the fare, then all that matters it resilience and determination.
I think my brain has kind of lulled itself into lack of urgency cause it thinks it won’t matter that I’m lazy and don’t earn money. It thinks I’m simply going to call off trips like this if I don’t earn money. But no, I’m going to teach my brain a lesson. That it might as well give me the resources to work hard cause I’m not going to pull back. You’re not going to enable me to work hard, brain? Fine, let’s go without money then, asshole-brain. That will be a challenge.
But of course, I’m hoping to not go without money. I don’t know any more how to convince you people to help me. No-one owes me anyhing. I’ve already shared what I think in my earlier posts. Everything that happens is exactly what needed to happen. In the end I’m sure I’m going to have an awesome trip that gives me another inner growth spurt and have bunch of awesome videos to show for it. It won’t be inferior experience without money, just different.
This is also why I have difficulty dealing with people giving excuses. If you are fucked up and dysfunctional and want to change, it travel is a good way to do it. Budget airlines and stuff like couchsurfing makes it so ridiculously easy and cheap these days, I can’t believe people don’t travel. And I’m not saying you even need to be fucked up to do it – regular joes will benefit from seeing the world. Maybe that’s for another post to discuss.
I know that couple of years ago I was the kind of guy that was waiting for the perfect circumstance, when I have a buffer of money in my bank account etc… But no, it’s not gonna happen. Instead I dare you to do the trip you always wanted in the most extremely imperfect and difficult circumstances as possible. Wake up to living people! If an introverted and shy loser can make a trip to Japan while barely affording to even going to country, surely you can do a cheap trip within the same continent?
So yeah, I’ve talked the talk, now I must walk the walk. No excuses, let’s do this.
Alternative Way to Help Me:
Don’t want to donate me money? Well that’s okay, how about let me work for you? I offer writing gigs etc. on Fiverr – Check out what I’m offering You can also hire me straight without any money going to Fiverr etc. Drop me a line on G+, Twitter or in email (if you’re subscribed you’ll get my email address) and we can discuss.