Happy New Year everyone. It’s time to cast the look to the future and see what I am going to be focusing on the forthcoming year, a year I hope to be the best of my life so far.
That whole which year has been the best of my life thinking is something I like to play with a lot in my mind, but it is really hard to figure out, bit of a mindfuck. It’s not that it matters anyway, I just find it funny to think about. I can’t really differentiate between 2012 and 2013 – perhaps in the former I had more powerful experiences, but during 2013 I had more of them and was taking it to the hilt.
Now I am really looking to further escalate the complete change of life that was set in motion on April 2012 – or technically even before it.
What is making setting goals for 2014 a bit challenging is that actually a lot of things has changed since I made the last fully committed decisions. I don’t really know if I’m going to stay in Malaysia, I only know that I am going to fly there in a week. And that I haven’t told my parents yet, which is gonna be a bit fucked up situation, but hey, that’s what I am all about, getting myself to those fucked up scenarios. I think it is fucked up enough to end up in Malaysia without any clue what’s gonna happen…
Life is an adventure though and I definitely don’t want to think that I’m complaining – I’m excited to see where this turn of events takes me. It is just a challenge to figure out what kind of goals I can set. Especially since if I choose to stay in Malaysia, I have no clue where I am going to be spending my time during the next year.
But I’ve been thinking about this, and realized, that why don’t I just set goals that are completely independent of where I’m staying.
One Main Focus
For me, the clear goal for this year that rises above everything else is to Become Social as is one of the things mentioned in the logo of my site. As you all should know by now, I’m socially awkward, anxious and anti-social introvert (enough descriptive words about it??) – that is something I want to change this year.
But “becoming more social” is too vague of a goal, so I need to get more specific. Also, shouldn’t I have some other focuses… Well, in the spirit of this post, I am going to set one “breakthrough goal” and adjust everything else towards that. I also want to set 2-4 smaller goals for the year as side projects so to speak. This breakthrough goal should be something that completely changes my life. The only facet where I see my life completely changed by now is indeed is the social life.
So how do I make my becoming social goal exact and quantifiable? Here’s how.
Main Goal of 2014: Becoming Social
- Approach at least five people every day / go out for at least an hour daily
- Approach a total of least 100 people every week
- Approach at least 10 people a day online every day.
Looks pretty insane? Let’s dissect it a bit. As you can see, it is all about approaching strangers for me. Sure, there’s more to social life than just talking to new people all the time, but this is the area I have biggest difficulty with – as you can see I can appear somewhat well-adjusted on camera and it’s the same with people I’ve know for a long time. It’s talking to strangers that’s the hard part for me. Besides, getting exposed to lot of new people should give me the social experience I definitely need.
The secondary aim of this, besides just getting me comfortable at being social at all times, is to build a rich social life. I will be approaching a lot of people – if I complete my goal I will have met over 5000 people by the end of the year – even if only one out of thousand leads to anything, I have five new close people in my life by the end of the year. Doesn’t sound a bad deal to me. It is likely be much more than that, which sounds like it might even get too much to handle for me.
Besides just the people I will approach, through online means I will contact another 3000 people – the benefit of this is that approaching 10 people online takes less than five minutes. So I am “drawing water” from every source.
Now I decided to set on a goal of five people every day because I don’t want to put myself up against the wall at all times – initially I was thinking of slapping myself with an insanely high goal like approaching 20 people a day – but on some days time constraints will force me to go a little bit lower – or I meet someone interesting and want to spend longer time talking to them instead of just approaching new people constantly. I still require at least an hour of being social every day, so I need to still keep the habit up every day.
To compensate the lowering of daily goal so drastically I set the weekly goal quite high 100 people a week means roughly fifteen per day. So I need to be talking to new people all the time. It also means that on some nights I will have to stay out longer than one hour to put more approaches in.
Setting Up Rest of My Life Around This Goal
The goal is ambitious to such extent that I can’t complete it unless I commit balls deep 100 % to it. One thing is for sure – I can’t be at home for this. You simply can’t put 100 weekly approaches of new people in if you are living a place with 900 population. So if I am to complete this goal, I need to be in a big city, or traveling at all times. That being said, while I do hope to be traveling for most of the year, I think at some point of the year I will come back home to recharge batteries for a while, probably for summer. Of course during that time the goal will be on hold. But the general idea is that I’d keep on this goal for the full year – and maybe beyond. After a year I will be wiser as to what kind of volume works best for me.
As far as other hobbies go, I don’t think this kind of life leaves room for much else. I am going to naturally keep working out and stretching daily as I’ve done so far, and I am going to play football as well. There won’t be room for much playing games, I wouldn’t think.
As said, my life will be mostly built around this goals, but I do want to have other side projects going on – life can’t be just mindlessly going around talking to people like a chicken that had its head cut off. So let’s list them in the order of importance:
- Traveling to Brazil for the World Cup
- Working at least 6 hours every day
- Gaining weight until I reach 90 kg
- Using my own book to improve my nutrition – then in turn improving the book as I go along.
- Writing at least one story per week.
- Visit at least two other new countries besides just Brazil.
- Start reading at least ten hours a week.
Let’s go through these goals in better detail.
Traveling to Brazil
Brazil and World Cup is a once in lifetime combination and for a football fan like me it would truly be a pilgrimage to do it. It will be an expensive trip though and will need planning and probably a lot of luck to complete it. If I do end up going there, you will be sure to see some videoblogging from there as well This will be one goal that I will see quite early on during the year if I am going to complete it – I think around March/April time I will be knowing how my finances have evolved and how much I would need to save for this trip.
Working 6 hours per day
Life needs to retain balance, and for me work is definitely important to keep funding this lifestyle. Perhaps some day I can cut back on working so much and focus on other things more – Now isn’t that time though. I need to plod through my days, putting in the work every day so I keep the momentum going. I don’t intend the coming year to be the hardest working year of my whole life, but it should be hardest working year of my life so far. 50-hour workweeks should be a regularity. Also I no longer want to scramble at the end of the week to make my hours, in fact I’d prefer if most of the work of the week has been already done by Friday.
It is not going to be an easy goal to complete, but it will frankly be a necessity.
Gaining weight until I reach 90 kg
When I came back from Japan, I was a skinny guy weighing 69 kg (152 pounds). Now, nearly 11 months later I weigh about 83 kg (182 pounds). Still a skinny guy though – which makes me think I can fairly healthily and without turning fat go for all the way to 90kg (touch from 200 pounds).
After that I will cut down and probably return to my ideal weight between 75-80. It’s a classing case of bulking first, then cutting. I do it mostly for gained strength, but also a bit for the aesthetics. Let’s face it, it’s nice to be more muscular, but mostly I care about performance.
Using my own book to improve my nutrition
I’ve been frustrated with my nutrition being far from perfect, especially since I should be practicing what I preached in my book – so I will do it kind of inversely, and use my own book as a guide to lead me into a more healthier lifestyle. In turn I get experience on how practical the book is in actual use which will help me to create the revised edition I’ve been planning to do for so long.
Writing at least one story per week
Within this goal is built-in another goal, writing at least an hour per day. I really want to get back into the groove when it comes to writing. Last year I wrote a lot of stories and I really want to improve on that and keep building on it. I also want to keep increasing the quality of the stories, spending more time per story.
Visit at least two new countries besides Brazil
This goal is already in the works, for I already booked the tickets to go to Hong Kong from Kuala Lumpur on January 23rd. The other country I visit, that I do not know yet. I might even end up traveling to three or four countries besides Brazil, but that’d just be nice bonus. This is a goal likely to get completed on its own weight without having that much exertion of effort.
Start reading at least ten hours a week
I’ve repeatedly expressed my frustration at my lack of reading, so I will really look to push past that thing. This week it’s too late to read much, but starting next week 10 hours a week will be my minimum. No excuses. I want to have a long list of books read by end of the year.
Wrapping It All Up
So as you can see, this year I set quite a bit more goals than usual, but there’s good synergy between the goals at least generally speaking. Reading supports really everything, writing is something I’ve done a lot already, working helps me to retain a focused mode through life and going out a lot motivates me to keep up with everything else – I don’t want to be putting myself out while being a complete loser.
I won’t want to obviously tackle all of these goals at once. It is just a continuous effort to get closer to that ideal. The main goal is what overrides everything else, naturally.
What do I expect my life to look a year from now? Completely different from now. I would expect a guy who is at ease with himself and who is living in a social abundance. Very focused and intense guy. One who has had a lot of experienced and that has grown a lot. One who essentially knows himself better by then.
It’s going to be a pretty exciting year folks. I’m in for a wild ride full of hard times and awesome times – isn’t that what life’s all about and what it’s supposed to be?
Hit me up in the comments to share your thoughts about my goals, and do share your own as well!